Friday, September 6, 2019
A View from the Bridge Essay Example for Free
A View from the Bridge Essay Marco is married and has got two children whilst Rodolfo is still single. When, both Catherine and Rodolfo see each other, it is almost like love at first site. Catherine uses flirtatious procedures to convey to the audience that she feels somewhat of him. When she starts using these actions, High heels Eddie does not like this and so sends her back to the room to get changed, Do me a favour, will you? Go ahead. This makes Catherine undergo embarrassment as Rodolfo was at the scene. I would want the audience to observe that both Catherine and Rodolfo have got feelings for each other and that Eddie is in the surroundings being jealous. Due to the relationship between Eddie and Catherine, Beatrices relationship is suffering as he is paying attention more towards Catherine then Beatrice. Another crucial scene/turning point in this play is when both, Rodolfo and Catherine are left unaccompanied in the apartment. Whilst in the room, Catherine questions Rodolfo about his motives, in which he is traumatized and was wondering if Eddie thought that too. This is because Eddie warns Catherine that he is after an American citizenship. She asks him, Would you still want to do it if it turned out we had to go live in Italy His reaction was, No; I will not marry you in Italy. I want to be a citizen. At this instant I would want the audience to become conscious that Rodolfo wants to marry Catherine just to be an American Citizen and that they could change their minds later on. Catherine replies to this and says that she does not want to leave Eddie after what he has done for her (Eddie has treated her as a daughter and paid for her to go to extra classes of her interest after leaving high school. ) She makes it sound that Eddie was an ex-lover or ex-husband of her, You thinks its so easy to turn around and say to a man hes noting to you no more? As a director I would want the audience to realize that Catherine is aware that she needs to grow up as she gets advice from Beatrice saying, Beatrice says to be a woman. At this point Catherine gets aggravated as she makes it sound as if she has to choose between Rodolfo and Eddie, I know him and now Im supposed to turn around and make a stranger out of him. She takes in mind what Beatrice suggested to her about being a woman which leads to her having sex with Rodolfo. This is a turning point to the audience and to Catherine. At this turning point I would want the audience to reconsider their views on Rodolfo about wanting to be an American citizen. No one would sleep with a woman and not have feelings for her. The light rises on Eddie. He enters the flat drunk and sees a glimpse of Catherine adjusting her dress and coming from the bedroom. At this particular moment, Eddie senses what the two have been up to. Rodolfo appears in the bedroom doorway. Eddie sees him and his arm jerks slightly in shock. He does this action as he wants to hit Rodolfo as he knows what they have been up to and that he is jealous and cannot bear it. He can not handle that Catherine is taking responsible of her own life. When a pause appears, as a director I would want to create tension in the audience as the characters are all hiked up. Shortly after the build up of tension, Eddie switches his actions and tells Rodolfo to Pack it up and Get out of here. Eddie gets dominant over Catherine by grabbing her and stopping her from following Rodolfo to her bedroom. She frees her arm, which indicates her rebelling against him and her wanting his approval. Eddie, at his point is jealous following what Rodolfo and Catherine have been up to and knows that he cannot have her. Soon after there is a sudden breakthrough of Eddies feelings as he, reaches out suddenly, draws her to him and as she strives to free himself he kisses her on the mouth. He kisses her to provoke Rodolfo and to see how she and he react. This all leads to violence in which, Rodolfo flies at him in attack. At this point Eddie kisses Rodolfo to show Catherine he is gay and to show her that Rodolfo did not prevent this from happening. The last crucial scene in this play is the last scene where Eddie gets killed. This consequence was created when Eddie did a very unintelligent thing of phoning the immigration bureau to report the two illegal immigrants, Rodolfo and Marco. He then regrets phoning the bureau up and tells them to move as they moved with more illegal immigrants which had a very violent family. This way Rodolfo and Marco would not get caught and would remain safe whereas the other illegal immigrants wouldnt. Soon after they decided, they did not have enough time to move, as the officers came to pick Rodolfo and Marco up. Eddie had begged Beatrice to tell them to move and soon after, she had realized what Eddie had done. She turned against Eddie and used harsh language against him, Hes a rat. At this time I would want my audience to turn against Eddie. This then lead to more violence of Eddie getting killed by Marco as he has suffered from his family being without food and money. I would want my audience to feel more sympathy for Marco rather than Rodolfo. The culture of this play is all in relation to a child who grassed his uncle to the immigration bureau seeing that he was an illegal immigrant. The kid was completely beaten up by his family and no-one wanted to know him after what he did. In an Italian family, the families need to be loyal to each other and if something goes wrong outside the family, the Sicilian community requires the law to be taken in hand and that justice should be done. I would want the audience to relate back to this during the last scene and keep this in mind as this is a sort of thing that Eddie had done but the consequences were much worse. If I was directing A View from the Bridge I would want my audience to see that there is a mixed relationship portrayed in this play. This is because of the actions, dialogue and motives used between the two characters. Throughout the play, I would want the audience to change their views on what they thought of the character of Eddie as he did some good quality things however he also did horrific things. The relationship between Eddie and Catherine would have never been further than an uncle and niece. Two relationships between, Eddie and Beatrice and Catherine and Rodolfo both got disturbed due to the actions undertaken by Eddie which affected the characters. I would want my audience to keep on re-evaluating their views on the relationship between Eddie and Catherine as this would make the play more interesting. Coming to the end of the play, the audience would have found out that Eddie did have feelings for Beatrice as his last words were My lovely B. BY JULAN SHAH Show preview only The above preview is unformatted text This student written piece of work is one of many that can be found in our GCSE Arthur Miller section.
Thursday, September 5, 2019
Social Work Essay
Social Work Essay Social work is a profession that focuses on people of all ages. The definition given by the International Federation of Social Workers is, The above definition states that social work values include solving problems, enhancing well-being, human rights, social justice, empowerment, social change and liberation. The definition of the word values differs depending on whether you are talking about personal values or professional values. Personal values are a set of principles that support peoples actions or behaviours. Professional values are guidelines like the Code of Practice set up by the Care Council for Wales that all social care workers must adhere to. As a social worker our personal values must not interfere with our professional values. We must be professional at all times. The role of a social worker is to shield vulnerable people, develop relationships and where possible help families to stay together while sticking to these guidelines. They also support people to enable them to live a happy life as possible. Social workers work as part of multi-disciplinary teams with other professions such as education, health and probation services. This is to make sure that all aspects of the service users life is taken into consideration when help is being discussed. If this is completed effectively no aspect of the service users life if left without any help if it is needed. Social workers work in various different organisations. Some work for local authorities in children and adult services departments there are also social workers working in hospitals and the voluntary and private sector. The above value of social justice includes the need for resources to be distributed evenly amongst all members of society, to ensure that basic human needs are met. It is the members of society that are socially excluded that find it difficult to access these resources. Many people that social workers work with are socially excluded and discriminated against for a number of reasons. Social exclusion is defined as, Social exclusion describes a way of life where opportunities are few, services are difficult to access and people lose hope. It is caused and upheld by a set of linked, and often recurring, problems like low income, lack of work, poor health, low educational attainment, living in a poor physical environment and high levels of crime. As a result of social exclusion it is difficult to reduce poverty and malnutrition due to the people who are socially excluded being more difficult to reach. People with less money are more likely to have poor levels of health and education. This is particularly true when lack of money is paired with lack of basic needs. Discrimination is also a big part of being socially excluded. Discrimination has been apparent as far back a 1834 with the Poor Law Amendment Act where people where categorised as either deserving or undeserving poor. The deserving poor included widows, the very old and the very ill, the undeserving poor included unmarried mothers. Some members of society still hold these views today. Members of society can be discriminated against for many reasons including age, race, ethnicity, gender and sexual orientation. Discrimination has negative affects for both the individual and society. It could result in the individual being too scared to leave the house for fear of being called names or in some cases attacked due to their race. This could cause them to become isolated which could cause depression. It is the responsibility of a social worker to see past the age of a service user or their race and to help them as an individual. The Quality Assurance Agency for Higher Education (2000) cited in Horner (2007, pg 141) talks about social work values and states that, It is important that at all times social workers practice in an anti oppressive and anti -discriminatory way. Both terms are often used interchangeably but the meaning of oppressive is different to that of discriminatory. Anti-discriminatory practice is compulsory by legislation. This started in the Sex Equality Act 1975, the Race Relations Act 1976 and the Children Act 1989. Equality is a basic principle with regards to the work the Welsh Government are doing. Before devolution there was no logical approach to inequalities in Wales. In Wales: A better country, it states that, There are differing levels of social exclusion depending on the area in which you live. Access to resources is easier If you live in the centre on Cardiff as you are close to all of the amenities you may need, for example a Doctors surgery if you are felling unwell or a supermarket selling copious amounts of fruit and vegetables to help provide a healthy balanced diet. If you live on the outskirts of the city where there are less houses and more open fields, you have further to travel to see a doctor or access fruit and vegetables, in most cases you need a car to access these and need to have good health in general to be able to make the journey. In 1998, twelve out of twenty-two Local Authorities in Wales had a higher percentage of unfit housing than the Welsh average of 8.5 percent (Welsh Government, 2006). This means that more than 8.5 percent of housing in over half of Wales wasnt suitable for people to live in. The issues social workers in Wales may come across are not only different depending on where in Wales they work but with Wales being a multi-cultural society they may come across a service user whose first language is different to their own. This does not just refer to people speaking Welsh but also people speaking other languages from all over the World, for example, Polish and Indian amongst others. Without prior knowledge of this, it is difficult to accommodate and you may find that your questions are now fully being understood or you are not fully understanding the questions. If you know in advance it may be possible to arrange for an interpreter, this would mean that the conversation is understood and you are more likely to give that service user the help that they need. Social services in Wales are delivered to the people by the twenty-two local authorities and around 1,800 voluntary and private organisations. The law requires Local authorities to provide Social Services. There are 150,000 people in Wales that are supported by social services. The Welsh Governments responsibilities for funding, setting the policy, reviewing, inspecting and regulating social services, cover, adult and child care, support and advice, grants and community voluntary care. The foundation of the Welsh Governments Social Services and Social Care work is the 10 year strategy Fulfilled Lives, Supportive Communities. The strategy is put to local authorities who have a responsibility, In conclusion, the role of a social worker is very varied and complex. Social workers face many issues while working with service users and their families. They work with people of all ages. There are many values that social workers must work to which can be found in the code of practice, outlined by the Care Council for Wales. Promoting social justice is a very important value that all social workers but work towards with service users. Everyone had personal values that they have developed as they have grown older but it is important that social workers stick to the professional values that they have agreed to uphold at all times and that their personal values do not interfere with these. Social workers work with the most vulnerable members of society and to ensure professionalism they stick to guidelines at all times. To help service users, multi-disciplinary teams are set up. These make sure that all aspect of the service users life is taken into consideration when trying to help them. It is not only Local Authorities that have social workers as part of the teams, there are also social workers working in the voluntary and private sector. The value of social justice includes the need for resources to be distributed evenly to all of society. It is the members of society that are socially excluded that find it hard to access these resources. People who are socially excluded have fewer opportunities and very often lose hope. It can be difficult to address social exclusion as people who are socially excluded are difficult to reach. Discrimination is a big part of social exclusion. People can be discriminated against because of their age, race, ethnic origin, gender and sexual orientation amongst others. There are only negative effects of discrimination which could lead to depression. Levels of social exclusion can be different depending on where people live, so no two social workers work with identical service users because they just do not exist.
Wednesday, September 4, 2019
Stakeholder Influence in Strategy Decisions
Stakeholder Influence in Strategy Decisions Devising a strategy should be a product of logical and external analysis, yet often appears to be a product of the power of stakeholders. Discuss using recent business examples. Johnson and Scholes (2002) p10 define strategy as ââ¬Å"the direction and scope of an organisation over the long term, which achieves advantage for the organisation through its configuration of resources within a changing environment and to fulfil stakeholder expectations.â⬠A strategic plan is therefore large scale future oriented activities that allow interaction with the competitive environment in order to achieve company objectives. It follows that strategic management is the process whereby a strategy is formulated, evaluated, and continuously improved. Strategic planning flows from the definition of an organisationââ¬â¢s vision, mission and objectives and subsequent environmental scanning, to understand the organisationââ¬â¢s strategic position with respect to the macro external environment, its industry, competitors, internal resources, competencies and expectations and influence of stakeholders. (Stoner, Freeman and Gilbert, 1995) This initial process establishes a basis for strategic choice by means of a match of identified strengths to opportunities. The translation of strategic choice into action is then implemented across all levels of the organisation through programmes, resources, technologies, and performance management structures. (Johnson and Scholes, 2002 and Davis, 2005) This essay focuses on the strategic position of the organisation in the context of its environment, its strategic capability, and stakeholder expectations. The purpose of an environmental scan is to develop a list of diverse variables from an uncertain and complex world to offer actionable responses and in so doing allow a structured framework for defensive or offensive actions. There are a variety of available analysis tools such as a PESTEL framework from a macro-environmental level, Porterââ¬â¢s Five Forces framework at an industry level, strategic groupings within an industry and individual market analysis. The results can then be applied in a SWOT (Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, and Threats) analysis to determine strategic choice. (Johnson and Scholes, 2002) PESTEL is an acronym representing the key forces that exist or are emerging in the external environment and suggests how they will, or might impact on future strategy and resources.à These comprise Political, Economic, Sociocultural, Technological, Environmental and Legal factors. (Johnson and Scholes, 2002) Changes in these forces and their interaction affect the types of products and services offered and impact on suppliers and distributors to the organisation. An example of political and legal forces in setting the climate for business, are the tax harmonisation processes in the European Union (EU) which have caused many multinational firms, including John Deere and Cargill, to relocate their head offices to Switzerland, a non EU member to avoid tax costs. Consequentially, the global competitive ratings for the Netherlands, Germany and other home countries of these firms plunged whilst the rating for Switzerland has surged. (Davis, 2005) The use of PESTEL in isolation and a mer e listing of possible influences without an understanding of the combined impact of a number of these forces could lead to inaction with respect to countering threats or pursuing opportunities to the detriment of the business. The combined effect of the factors can be understood by identifying structural drivers of change that affect the structure of an industry sector or market. These include an increasing convergence of markets as customer needs and wants become similar (eg standardisation of strategy textbooks across international higher education institutions), maximising cost advantages achieved through economies of scale by centralised production in low cost, labour efficient countries such as India and China, or the differential impact of the factors dependant on industry type. (eg Pharmaceutical sales to an aging population in a first world country) (Johnson and Scholes, 2002) This reinforces the need to regard strategy formulation as an interactive multidisciplinary process requiring creative thinking. Porter suggests that industry selection and analysis is a vital component of strategic planning. An industry is ââ¬Å"a group of firms producing products that are close substitutes for one another.â⬠(Johnson and Scholes, 2002, p110) Competitive forces within an industry can be analysed in the contexts of the sources of competition, the dynamics of that competition and strategic groupings. Although criticised as being too generic in nature, Porterââ¬â¢s Five Forces framework is useful in addressing key interacting forces affecting a strategic business unit with a distinct market for goods or services within an industry. Porter referred to these forces as the microenvironment so as to contrast it with the more general term, macro environment. They consist of those forces close to an organisation that affect its ability to serve its customers and make a profit. A change in any of the forces normally requires a company to re-assess the marketplace. (Porter, 1996) An example is that of the mobile phone network industry where the barrier to entry by new competitors is the huge entry cost associated with 3G broadband licenses. The purchasing power of buyers is high with a significant range of choices between networks and the power of suppliers increasing through alliances such as that of Casio and Hitachi in 2003. (Davis, 2005) The threat of substitute products is increasing as Personal Digital Assistance (PDA) convergence with phones and voice-over-internet technology emerges with the potential to bypass the network operators. Competitive rivalry between firms with similar products is high with a broad range of products on offer to the consumer. (Johnson and Scholes, 2002) The concept of strategic grouping addresses the criticism of Porterââ¬â¢s model where an industry is considered to be too generic to provide a basis for understanding the competitive environment by applying the Five Forces framework. Johnson and Scholes, 2002, p122 define strategic groups as ââ¬Å"organisations within an industry with similar strategic characteristics following similar strategies or competing on similar bases.â⬠These firms are not homogeneous within the industry and follow strategies common to the group, but different to firms in other groups in the same industry. An example is a pharmaceutical manufacturer with a unique medication product protected by patent serving a common market using a similar strategy. (Davis, 2005) Understanding the competitive environment together with current and potential customer needs and wants will determine the success or failure of an organisation. Porter suggests that there are two generic strategies: cost or differentiation. Marketing segmentation identifies similarities and differences between individual and customer groups based on geographic, demographic lifestyle and benefit segmentation. An appreciation of customer values in a market segment and matching needs against the organisationââ¬â¢s capacity to meet those needs, is a critical aspect of determining strategic capability. (Pitt, 1997) The emergence of global firms suggests that traditional models are limited in application and that there is a need for the development of a broader integrative international strategic business model framework. (Ricart et al, 2004) Strategic capability involves the identification and evaluation of an organisationââ¬â¢s strengths and weaknesses in the functional areas of the business in the context of the external environment analyses. It is typically recorded in a SWOT framework. It represents an understanding of customerââ¬â¢s perceptions of value, the critical success factors through which that value is realised and unique competencies, processes, and technology to achieve competitive advantage. (Hussey, 2002.) The core competencies of the organisation are the unique capabilities that are critical success factors in achieving competitive advantage and hence key to the delivery of customer value. They form the foundation for differentiation and for increasing perceived customer benefits. Competencies must evolve as the needs and wants of customers change and a focus on developing critical competencies that affect market position, share and power is key. (Hamel and Prahalad, 1994) A useful model to analyse an organisationââ¬â¢s core competencies that underpin its competitive advantage is Porterââ¬â¢s Value Chain Analysis. This attempts an understanding of how the organisation creates customer value by examining the contributions of various activities within the business to that value. An organisationââ¬â¢s value chain is normally part of a broader value system that represents a set of inter-organisational linkages and relationships to create the product or service. It separates prima ry and support activities through which that value is generated. (Johnson and Scholes, 2002) Porter argues that competitive strategy is about being different, and focussing on those activities that deliver a unique mix of value and doing them better than competitors. (Porter, 1996) The structured and systematic process of analysing the external and internal environment described thus far is carried out by a consultative process with stakeholders and should present a sound basis for establishing the foundation for the organisationââ¬â¢s strategy formulation. However, the impact of stakeholders and the complex role that people play from a political and cultural perspective should be taken into account. (Johnson and Scholes, 2002) Davis, 2005, suggests that stakeholders are individuals or groups with an interest in the success of an organisation to deliver intended results and on whom the organisation itself depends. Donaldson and Preston, 1995, p64, argue that this general statement is too wide should be qualified to ââ¬Å"be those persons or groups with a legitimate interest in procedure and / or substantive aspects of corporate activity.â⬠Walsh, 2005, suggests that too broad a definition creates a situation whereby managers function in order benefit a stakeholder group or act as a continuous conduit to stakeholders. Stakeholders may include employees, unions, customers, financial institutions, suppliers, shareholders etc depending on the accepted definition. The definition of stakeholder is therefore important to the organisation because it impacts on the strategic plan formulation. The relationship between stakeholders and the organisation encompasses the field of stakeholder management that ranges in complexity from stakeholder mapping through to stakeholder collaboration and social capital. The corporate governance structure of the organisation and the regulatory framework within which it operates should determine who the organisation serves and how the purpose and direction of the organisation is determined. This includes the management of the capacity of a stakeholder to influence the organisation as well as accountability issues in the formal structure. This is typically structured through a separation of ownership and management at main board level, balanced by non-executive directors and a non executive chairperson. Internal or organisational stakeholders may blur this line through the inappropriate use of power and politics. Society in turn creates expectations of the organisation in terms of ethics and within a cultural context that need to be congruen t with that of the organisation. (Donald and Preston, 1995) The organisational field approach suggests that networks of related organisations develop which share common assumptions, values, and processes that may incorporate common organisational views on stakeholders. Under this scenario, relationship with stakeholders are taken for granted leading to legitimised strategies shaped by expectations being accepted without a structured strategic planning process occurring. (Walsh, 2005) A stakeholder map is a tool that inventories and categorises a companys stakeholders, shows their inter-relationships, expectations, and power. It illustrates the approaches that the organisation can follow to achieve its business objectives while winning support from its stakeholders. It raises the dilemma of ethics in that stakeholder management through such a strategy can be subverted to the detriment of the organisation. (Johnson and Scholes, 2002) The Enron debacle is manifestation of both this dilemma and the organisational field phenomenon which allowed the failure of corporate governance structures when unethical conduct was accepted in the areas of finance and management by organisational stakeholders. The Enron case was one of the largest bankruptcy cases in US history. In 2001, it was the fifth largest company on the Fortune 500 with revenues of USD 100 billion, 19,000 employees, and rated the ââ¬Å"most admired companyâ⬠six years in a row by Fortune magazine. (Culp an and Trussell, 2005) The basic premise of Enronââ¬â¢s strategy was to create markets for goods and services traditionally transacted through complex distribution channels. It leveraged off its competitive advantage of delivering services efficiently and stretching itââ¬â¢s competency through added risk management features. The high growth phase of the organisation during the 1990ââ¬â¢s and changed business strategy and corporate culture of Enron was driven by top management. In the process, Enron appeared innovative and profitable to the extent that the traditional agency relationship underpinning the firm as a nexus of contracts between the shareholders (principals) and the management as agents were left unchecked, which in turn impacted negatively on the broader spectrum of stakeholders. (Donald and Preston, 1995 and Culpan and Trussell, 2005) An ostensibly well structured, high profile corporation within the highly regulated environment of a security exchange, audited by a major audit firm was bought down by unethical conduct of its senior executive team with possible collusion by external stakeholders. The ultimate test of how well a strategy has been thought out is at implementation level and the controls around that implementation. Unless a strategy can be executed effectively with appropriate checks and balances then it will almost certainly fall short in achieving objectives. This means that strategy has to be linked to the organisationââ¬â¢s objectives, mission, operations, and measurable outcomes within a corporate governance framework that meets the needs of the stakeholders. The evolution of the Kaplan and Nortonââ¬â¢s Balanced Scorecard to incorporate financial, customer, learning and growth, and internal process metrics evaluated against the vision and strategic objectives of the organisation provide one such strategic management control methodology across the organisation. (Kaplan and Norton, 1996 and Kaplan and Norton, 2001) In conclusion, this essay has examined the formal process of strategy development and given examples of tools from the literature to systematically evaluate the external and internal environments of the organisation. It has sought to demonstrate that organisations are facing dynamic and rapidly evolving forces that influence its strategic direction. This is especially true with the emergence of globalisation and intensively competitive world markets. The eventual choice of a strategic direction for an organisation is a function of the values and expectations of a broad range of stakeholders which influence strategic decision making through political power over the organisation within a cultural and ethical context. It is the control through governance structures, and ongoing measurement of the strategic implementation process that will determine the successful outcome of the strategy and concomitant success of the organisation. References Cuplan, R. and Trussel, J. (2005) ââ¬Å"Applying the Agency and Stakeholder Theories to the Enron Debacle.â⬠Business and Society Review. Volume 110, 1. Davis, F. R. (2005) Strategic Management: Concepts and Cases. New Jersey, Pearson Prentice Hall. Donaldson, T. and Preston, L. E. (1995) ââ¬Å"The Stakeholder Theory of the Corporation: Concepts, Evidence and Implications.â⬠Academy of Management Review. Volume 20, 1. Hamel, G. and Prahalad, C. K. (1994) Competing for the Future. Boston, Harvard Business School Press. Hussey, D. (Janââ¬âFeb 2002) ââ¬Å"Company Analysis: Determining Strategic Capability.â⬠Strategic Change. Johnson, G. and Scholes, K. (2002) Exploring Corporate Strategy Sixth Edition. London, Prentice Hall. Kaplan, R. S. and Norton, D. P. (1996) The Balanced Scorecard. Boston, Harvard Business School Press. Kaplan, R. S. and Norton, D. P. (2001) ââ¬Å"Transforming the Balanced Scorecard from Performance Management to Strategic Management.â⬠Accounting Horizons. Volume 15, 1. Pitt, L. (1997) Marketing for Managers: A Practical Approach. Cape Town, Juta Ltd. Porter, M. (November ââ¬â December 1996) ââ¬Å"What is Strategy?â⬠Harvard Business Review. Ricart, E. J. et al. (2004) ââ¬Å"New Frontiers in International Strategy.â⬠Journal of International Business Studies. Volume 35, 3. Stoner, J. Freeman, E. and Gilbert, D. (1995) Management Sixth Edition. Englewood Cliffs, New Jersey, Prentice Hall. Walsh, J. P. (2005) ââ¬Å"Taking Stock of Stakeholder Management.â⬠Academy of Management Review. Volume 30, 2.
Accounting Terms :: essays research papers
The following explanations of terms are presented to aid in understanding the narrative discussions and illustrations included in this text and the terminology generally used in governmental accounting, auditing, financial reporting and budgeting. Because this glossary is reprinted from the Government Finance Association's Governmental Accounting and Financial Reporting, the terms and explanations have not been modified to reflect specific Texas school district issues, etc. Synonyms for specific terms also may be presented in this appendix. In such instances, the abbreviation "syn." is used before the term. ACCOUNTABILITY. Being obliged to explain one's actions, to justify what one does. Accountability requires governments to answer to the citizenry-to justify the raising of public resources and the purposes for which they are used. Governmental accountability is based on the belief that the citizenry has a "right to know," a right to receive openly declared facts that may lead to public debate by the citizens and their elected representatives. [SGAC1] ACCOUNTING PRINCIPLES BOARD (APB). Authoritative private-sector standard-setting body that preceded the FASB. The APB issued guidance in the form of Opinions. ACCOUNTING STANDARDS EXECUTIVE COMMITTEE (AcSEC). An AICPA committee that is authorized to issue Practice Bulletins. A Practice Bulletin specifically targeted to state and local governments and cleared by the GASB would enjoy "level 2" status on the hierarchy of authoritative sources of GAAP established by SAS No. 69, The Meaning of "Present Fairly in Conformity with Generally Accepted Accounting Principles" in the Independent Auditor's Report. ACCRUAL BASIS OF ACCOUNTING. A method of accounting that recognizes the financial effect of transactions, events, and interfund activities when they occur, regardless of the timing of related cash flows. ACQUISITION COSTS. Term used in connection with public-entity risk pools. Costs that vary with and are primarily related to the acquisition of new and renewal contracts. Commissions and other costs (e.g., salaries of certain employees involved in the underwriting and policy issue functions, and inspection fees) that are primarily related to contracts issued or renewed during the period in which the costs are incurred are considered to be acquisition costs [SGAS 10] ACTIVITY. A specific and distinguishable service performed by one or more organizational components of a government to accomplish a function for which the government is responsible (e.g., police is an activity within the public safety function). ACTUARIAL ACCRUED LIABILITY. Term used in connection with defined benefit pension plans. That portion, as determined by a particular actuarial cost method, of the actuarial present value of pension plan benefits and expenses which is not provided for by future normal costs.
Tuesday, September 3, 2019
Terrorism and Morality by Haig Khatchadourian Essay -- Terrorism Moral
Terrorism and Morality by Haig Khatchadourian In ââ¬Å"Terrorism and Morality,â⬠Haig Khatchadourian argues that terrorism is always wrong. Within this argument, Khatchadourian says that all forms of terrorism are wrong because the outcome deprives those terrorized of their basic humanity. To this end, Khatchadourian says that even forms of terrorism that are designed to bring about a moral good are wrong because of the methods used to achieve that good. Before Khatchadourian spells out why terrorism is wrong, he defines what terrorism is, what causes terrorism, and what people believe terrorism to mean. With a working definition in place, Khatchadourian examines terrorismââ¬â¢s role in a just war and shows that terrorism is never just, even during war. With the assertion that terrorism, even during wartime is unjust, Khatchadourian analyzes the variations of innocence and non-innocence surrounding the victims of a terrorist attack. The analysis of innocence and non-innocence is accomplished through revi ew of the principal of discrimination and the principal of proportion and how each relates to terrorism. From these philosophical and ethical standpoints, Khatchadourian finds that terrorism is unjust and wrong because of the way it groups and punishes the innocent with the guilty, not allowing the victim to properly respond to the charges against them. Finally, Khatchadourian looks at how terrorism is always wrong because of the way it denies a person their basic human rights. In examination of personââ¬â¢s human rights, Khatchadourian finds that terrorism specifically ââ¬Å"violates its targetsââ¬â¢ right to be treated as moral persons,â⬠as it inflicts pain, suffering and death to those who are not deserving (298). Main Idea... ...l person. Beyond Khatchadourianââ¬â¢s discussion on the attack on the moral person, I was moved by his discussion on the innocent and non-innocent. In light of the recent terrorist attacks on the United States, I think of all the innocents that were harmed: secretaries working in the World Trade Centerââ¬â¢s Twin Towers, firefighters who rushed into burning buildings to save those who could not save themselves, and people in mail rooms who unsuspectingly perform a duty that could cost them their lives, naming only a few. These innocents, who could in no way be connected to U.S policy or government, highlight the demoralizing and destructive effect that terrorism carries. The plight of the innocent in terrorist attacks highlights the injustice behind terrorist attacks. Works Cited Khatchadourian, Haig. ââ¬Å"Terrorism and Morality.â⬠Applied Philosophy. Ed. 1991
Monday, September 2, 2019
Analysis of I Sit and Look Out by Walt Whitman Essay
I sit and look outâ⬠by Walt Whitman echoes all miseries and atrocities of life that rose to the surface in the wake of capitalism. 19th century witnessed a sea change in the lives of people as rat race for materialistic possession became more prominent and principles were relegated, concerns and emotions were sidelined from inside of human beings. The poet pen pictures such a sad tale of human life by attempting to pose as onlooker who watches everything but does nothing to alter situations. In this analysis of ââ¬Å"I Sit and look out ââ¬Å"by Walt Whitman, the capitalization of the verb ââ¬Å"sitâ⬠denotes the action of an onlooker. It is also symbolic of the speaker who sits idle and shows no sign to do anything. His constant position is also indicative of his complacent confinement which is miles away from suffering multitudes. On the other hand, the idea of ââ¬Å"I Sit and look outâ⬠is expressed through the term ââ¬Ëlook outââ¬â¢ that speaks of his own position which is safe and secure, away from the sufferings of the mundane world. In ââ¬ËI sit and look outâ⬠by Walt Whitman, the usage of free verses is abundant which serves to denote a never changing situation. All throughout the poem, the poet keeps an undermined toned of pessimism and paints an apocalyptic imagery that hits the readers as they progress in the poem. ââ¬Å"I Sit and look out ââ¬Å"by Walt Whitman is also a fine instance of the authorââ¬â¢s disillusionment with the world that is evident through the first two lines of the poem and it continues to the point where he exclaims; ââ¬Å"I SIT and look out upon all the sorrows of the world, and upon all oppression and shame; I hear secret convulsive sobs from young men, at anguish with themselves, remorseful after deeds done; I see, in low life, the mother misused by her children, dying, neglected, gaunt, desperate; I see the wife misused by her husband-I see the treacherous seducer of young women; The poem is more of a study of this dystopian world where oppression and shame rule the roost of the society. The theme of ââ¬Å"I Sit and look out ââ¬Å"draws upon an image of seclusion as the poet feels that he is located and placed at an altitude that is way higher and away from the episodes of sufferings and misery. The paroxysmal sobs of youth stifled in World War, having an albatross around their neck is an imagery that speaks of their remorseful actions. Walt Whitman talks about children who have taken advantage of their own mothers and now she lies all alone distressed, her solitude beckons her children every moment. The poet speaks of a distressed time where wives are put to misuse by their husbands,à cheated, abused and tortured. The husbands are pen pictured as ââ¬Å"callous loversââ¬â¢ who picks up young women and deceives them without a shade of remorse or guilt. The theme of ââ¬Å"I sit and look outâ⬠points at the jealousy of the human race among themselves, unrequited love that is seemingly impossible to hide. The angst and the anxiety of the poet, the fear and the tension that rumbles up the poetââ¬â¢s mind while he sits comfortably in his place is an awakening call for the readers to rise up and take a step in altering the situation. Walt Whitmanââ¬â¢s agony and meanness are justly defined in the lines; ââ¬Å"I observe a famine at sea, I observe the sailors casting lots who shall be killââ¬â¢d to preserve the lives of the rest, I observe the slights and degradations cast by arrogant persons upon laborers, the poor, and upon Negroes, and the likes; All theseââ¬âall the meanness and agony without end I sitting look out upon,See, hear, and am silent.ââ¬Å" The poet seeks to demarcate emotions in his poemby introducing camouflage to pertain jealousy and unrequited love behind the mask of smiles and affability. The ego is hosted and the sufferings are subdued and the speaker is never at rest although he doesnââ¬â¢t move from his position. Perhaps, the process of being an onlooker is more painful than being the victim. In other words, the poet calls one and all to rise and do what is right to free themselves from the shackles of pain and liberation and pacify their ego. It is the onlooker who sits silent through the dangerous aftermaths of war, the deaths of millions and autocracy that causes dents within the state. He has to bear the pain as he beholds the sight of prisoners-tortured and tormented-the most terrible byproduct of wars and battles fought. The pen picturisation is horrific, where sailors are thrown into the sea to fight the waves and survive to the shores. The poor workers, the Negros are subjected to slavery in the hands of the capitalist world where nothing prevails but oppression and penury. ââ¬Å"I Sit and look out ââ¬Ëtransforms itself to be a worthy satire of troubled times where agony and not beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder. Itââ¬â¢s good to know: â⬠¢Walt Whitman has been claimed as Americaââ¬â¢s first ââ¬Å"poet of democracyâ⬠, a title meant to reflect his ability to write in a singularly American character â⬠¢Whitmanââ¬â¢s poetry has been set to music by a large number of composers; indeed it has been suggested his poetry has been set to music more than any other American poet except for Emily Dickinson and Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Sunday, September 1, 2019
Spirit Bound Chapter Twenty
ââ¬Å"YOU'RE NOT MOROI!â⬠HE CONTINUED. He wasn't shouting, but we'd definitely gotten the attention of the people standing near us. ââ¬Å"You're Rose Hathaway, aren't you? How dare you and your impure blood invade the sanctity of ourââ¬âââ¬Å" ââ¬Å"That's enough,â⬠a lofty voice suddenly said. ââ¬Å"I'll take it from here.â⬠Even with her face covered, there was no mistaking that voice. Tatiana swept in beside the guy, wearing a silver flowered mask and a long-sleeved gray dress. I'd probably seen her earlier in the crowd and not even realized it. Until she spoke, she blended in with everyone else. The whole room was quiet now. Daniella Ivashkov scurried up behind Tatiana, her eyes widening behind her mask when she recognized me. ââ¬Å"Adrianââ¬ââ⬠she began. But Tatiana was seizing the situation. ââ¬Å"Come with me.â⬠There was no question that the order was for me or that I would obey. She turned and walked swiftly toward the room's entrance. I hurried behind her, as did Adrian and Daniella. As soon as we were out in the torch-lit hall, Daniella turned on Adrian. ââ¬Å"What were you thinking? You know I don't mind you bringing Rose to certain events, but this wasââ¬âââ¬Å" ââ¬Å"Inappropriate,â⬠said Tatiana crisply. ââ¬Å"Although, perhaps it is fitting that a dhampir see how much the sacrifices of her people are respected.â⬠That shocked us all into a moment of silence. Daniella recovered herself first. ââ¬Å"Yes, but tradition states thatââ¬âââ¬Å" Tatiana interrupted her again. ââ¬Å"I'm well aware of the tradition. It's a bad breach of etiquette, but Rosemarie being here certainly doesn't ruin our intentions. Losing Priscillaâ⬠¦Ã¢â¬ Tatiana didn't choke up, exactly, but she lost some of her normal composure. I didn't think of someone like her as having a best friend, but Priscilla pretty much had been. How would I act if I'd lost Lissa? Not nearly so controlled. ââ¬Å"Losing Priscilla is something I'll feel for a very, very long time,â⬠Tatiana managed at last. Her sharp eyes were on me. ââ¬Å"And I hope you really do understand how much we need and value you and all the other guardians. I know sometimes your race feels underappreciated. You aren't. Those who died have left a gaping hole in our ranks, one that leaves us even more undefended, as I'm sure you must know.â⬠I nodded, still surprised Tatiana wasn't shrieking for me to get out. ââ¬Å"It's a big loss,â⬠I said. ââ¬Å"And it makes the situation worse because numbers are what harm us half the timeââ¬âespecially when the Strigoi form large groups. We can't always match that.â⬠Tatiana nodded, seeming pleasantly surprised we'd agreed on something. That made two of us. ââ¬Å"I knew you'd understand. Nonethelessâ⬠¦Ã¢â¬ She turned toward Adrian. ââ¬Å"You shouldn't have done this. Some lines of propriety need to be maintained.â⬠Adrian was surprisingly meek. ââ¬Å"Sorry, Aunt Tatiana. I just thought it was something Rose should see.â⬠ââ¬Å"You'll keep this to yourself, won't you?â⬠asked Daniella, turning back to me. ââ¬Å"A lot of the guests are very, very conservative. They wouldn't want this getting out.â⬠That they met by firelight and played dress-up? Yeah, I could see them wanting that kept a secret. ââ¬Å"I won't tell anyone,â⬠I assured them. ââ¬Å"Good,â⬠said Tatiana. ââ¬Å"Now, you should still probably leave beforeââ¬âis that Christian Ozera?â⬠Her eyes had drifted back toward the crowded room. ââ¬Å"Yes,â⬠both Adrian and I said. ââ¬Å"He didn't get an invitation,â⬠exclaimed Daniella. ââ¬Å"Is that your fault too?â⬠ââ¬Å"It's not my fault so much as my genius,â⬠said Adrian. ââ¬Å"I doubt anyone will know, so long as he behaves himself,â⬠said Tatiana with a sigh. ââ¬Å"And I'm sure he'd take any opportunity he can to talk to Vasilisa.â⬠ââ¬Å"Oh,â⬠I said, without thinking. ââ¬Å"That's not Lissa.â⬠Lissa had actually turned her back toward Christian and was speaking to someone else while casting anxious looks out the door at me. ââ¬Å"Who is it?â⬠asked Tatiana. Crap. ââ¬Å"That's, um, Mia Rinaldi. She's a friend of ours from St. Vladimir's.â⬠I'd almost considered lying and giving her a royal name. Some families were so big that it was impossible to keep track of everyone. ââ¬Å"Rinaldi.â⬠Tatiana frowned. ââ¬Å"I think I know a servant with that name.â⬠I was actually pretty impressed that she knew the people who worked for her. Yet again, my opinion of her shifted. ââ¬Å"A servant?â⬠asked Daniella, giving her son a warning look. ââ¬Å"Is there anyone else I should know about?â⬠ââ¬Å"No. If I'd had more time, I probably could have got Eddie here. Hell, maybe even Jailbait.â⬠Daniella looked scandalized. ââ¬Å"Did you just say Jailbait?â⬠ââ¬Å"It's just a joke,â⬠I said hastily, not wanting to make this situation worse. I was afraid of how Adrian might answer. ââ¬Å"It's what we sometimes call our friend Jill Mastrano.â⬠Neither Tatiana nor Daniella seemed to think that was a joke at all. ââ¬Å"Well, no one seems to realize they don't belong,â⬠said Daniella, nodding toward Christian and Mia. ââ¬Å"Though the gossips here will no doubt be running wild with how Rose interrupted this event.â⬠ââ¬Å"Sorry,â⬠I said, feeling bad that I might have gotten her in trouble. ââ¬Å"Nothing to be done for it now,â⬠said Tatiana wearily. ââ¬Å"You should leave now so that everyone thinks you were severely chastised. Adrian, you come back with us and make sure your other ââ¬Ëguests' don't raise any attention. And do not do something like this again.â⬠ââ¬Å"I won't,â⬠he said, almost convincingly. The three began to turn away, leaving me to skulk off, but Tatiana paused and glanced back. ââ¬Å"Wrong or not, don't forget what you saw here. We really do need guardians.â⬠I nodded, a flush of pride running through me at her acknowledgment. Then she and the others returned to the room. I watched them wistfully, hating that everyone in there thought I'd been kicked out in disgrace. Considering it could have gone a lot worse for me, I decided to count my blessings. I removed the mask, having nothing more to hide, and made the trek back upstairs and outdoors. I hadn't gotten very far when someone stepped out in front of me. It was a sign of my preoccupation that I nearly leapt ten feet in the air. ââ¬Å"Mikhail,â⬠I exclaimed. ââ¬Å"You scared me half to death. What are you doing out here?â⬠ââ¬Å"Actually, I've been looking for you.â⬠There was an anxious, nervous look about him. ââ¬Å"I went by your building earlier, but you weren't around.â⬠ââ¬Å"Yeah, I was at the Masquerade of the Damned.â⬠He stared at me blankly. ââ¬Å"Never mind. What's up?â⬠ââ¬Å"I think we might have a chance.â⬠ââ¬Å"Chance for what?â⬠ââ¬Å"I heard you tried to see Dimitri today.â⬠Ah, yes. The topic I definitely wanted to think more about. ââ¬Å"Yeah. ââ¬ËTry' is pretty optimistic. He doesn't want to see me, never mind the army of guardians blocking me out.â⬠Mikhail shifted uncomfortably, peering around like a frightened animal. ââ¬Å"That's why I came to find you.â⬠ââ¬Å"Okay, I'm really not following any of this.â⬠I was also starting to get a headache from the wine. Mikhail took a deep breath and exhaled. ââ¬Å"I think I can sneak you in to see him.â⬠I waited for a moment, wondering if there was a punch line coming or if maybe this was all some delusion born out of my wound-up emotions. Nope. Mikhail's face was deadly serious, and while I still didn't know him that well, I'd picked up enough to realize he didn't really joke around. ââ¬Å"How?â⬠I asked. ââ¬Å"I tried andââ¬âââ¬Å" Mikhail beckoned for me to follow. ââ¬Å"Come on, and I'll explain. We don't have much time.â⬠I wasn't about to waste this chance and hurried after him. ââ¬Å"Has something happened?â⬠I asked, once I'd caught up to his longer stride. ââ¬Å"Didâ⬠¦ did he ask for me?â⬠It was more than I dared to hope for. Mikhail's use of the word sneak didn't really support that idea anyway. ââ¬Å"They've lightened his guard,â⬠Mikhail explained. ââ¬Å"Really? How many?â⬠There had been about a dozen down there when Lissa visited, including her escort. If they'd come to their senses and realized they only needed a guy or two on Dimitri, then that boded well for everyone accepting that he was no longer Strigoi. ââ¬Å"He's down to about five.â⬠ââ¬Å"Oh.â⬠Not great. Not horrible. ââ¬Å"But I guess even that means they're a little closer to believing he's safe now?â⬠Mikhail shrugged, keeping his eyes on the path ahead of us. It had rained during the Death Watch, and the air, while still humid, had cooled a little. ââ¬Å"Some of the guardians do. But it'll take a royal decree from the Council to officially declare what he is.â⬠I almost came to a halt. ââ¬Å"Declare what he is?â⬠I exclaimed. ââ¬Å"He's not a what! He's a person. A dhampir like us.â⬠ââ¬Å"I know, but it's out of our hands.â⬠ââ¬Å"You're right. Sorry,â⬠I grumbled. No point in shooting the messenger. ââ¬Å"Well, I hope they get off their asses and come to a decision soon.â⬠The silence that followed spoke legions. I gave Mikhail a sharp glare. ââ¬Å"What? What aren't you telling me?â⬠I demanded. He shrugged. ââ¬Å"The rumor is that there's some other big thing being debated in the Council right now, something that takes priority.â⬠That enraged me too. What in the world could take priority over Dimitri? Calm, Rose. Stay calm. Focus. Don't let the darkness make this worse. I always fought to keep it buried, but it often exploded in times of stress. And this? Yeah, this was a pretty stressful time. I shifted back to the original topic. We reached the holding building, and I took the steps up two at a time. ââ¬Å"Even if they've lightened the guardians on Dimitri, they still won't let me in. The ones that are there would know I was ordered to keep away.â⬠ââ¬Å"A friend of mine's covering the front shift right now. We won't have long, but he'll tell the guardians in the holding area that you were authorized to come down.â⬠Mikhail was about to open the door, and I stopped him, putting my hand on his arm. ââ¬Å"Why are you doing this for me? The Moroi Council might not think Dimitri's a big deal, but the guardians do. You could get in big trouble.â⬠He looked down at me, again with that small, bitter smile. ââ¬Å"Do you have to ask?â⬠I thought about it. ââ¬Å"No,â⬠I said softly. ââ¬Å"When I lost Sonyaâ⬠¦Ã¢â¬ Mikhail closed his eyes for a heartbeat, and when he opened them, they seemed to be staring off into the past. ââ¬Å"When I lost her, I didn't want to go on living. She was a good personââ¬âreally. She turned Strigoi out of desperation. She saw no other way to save herself from spirit. I would give anythingââ¬âanythingââ¬âfor a chance to help her, to fix things between us. I don't know if that'll ever be possible for us, but it is possible for you right now. I can't let you lose this.â⬠With that, he let us in, and sure enough, there was a different guardian on duty. Just as Mikhail had said, the guy called down to tell the jail guardians Dimitri had a visitor. Mikhail's friend seemed incredibly nervous about it all, which was understandable. Still, he was willing to help. It was amazing, I thought, what friends would do for each other. These last couple of weeks were undeniable proof of that. Just like at Lissa's visit, two guardians showed up to escort me downstairs. I recognized them from when I'd been in her head, and they seemed surprised to see me. If they'd overheard Dimitri adamantly saying he didn't want me to visit, then my presence would indeed be shocking. But as far as they knew, someone in power had condoned me being here, so they asked no questions. Mikhail trailed us as we wound our way down, and I felt my heartbeat and breathing grow rapid. Dimitri. I was about to see Dimitri. What would I say? What would I do? It was almost too much to comprehend. I had to keep mentally slapping myself to focus, or else I was going to slide into dumbstruck shock. When we reached the hallway that held the cells, I saw two guardians standing in front of Dimitri's cell, one at the far end, and two others by the entrance we'd come through. I stopped, uneasy about the thought of others overhearing me talk to Dimitri. I didn't want an audience like Lissa had had, but with the emphasis on security here, I might not have a choice. ââ¬Å"Can I get a little privacy?â⬠I asked. One of my escorts shook his head. ââ¬Å"Official orders. Two guardians have to be posted at the cell at all times.â⬠ââ¬Å"She's a guardian,â⬠pointed out Mikhail mildly. ââ¬Å"So am I. Let us go. The rest can wait by the door.â⬠I flashed Mikhail a grateful look. I could handle having him nearby. The others, deciding we would be safe enough, moved discreetly to the ends of the hall. It wasn't total and complete privacy, but they wouldn't hear everything. My heart felt ready to burst from my chest as Mikhail and I walked over to Dimitri's cell and faced it. He was seated almost as he had been when Lissa arrived: on the bed, curled up into himself, back facing us. Words stuck in my throat. Coherent thought fled from my mind. It was like I'd totally forgotten the reason I'd come here. ââ¬Å"Dimitri,â⬠I said. At least, that's what I tried to say. I choked up a little, so the sounds that came out of my mouth were garbled. It was apparently enough, though, because Dimitri's back suddenly went rigid. He didn't turn around. ââ¬Å"Dimitri,â⬠I repeated, more clearly this time. ââ¬Å"It'sâ⬠¦ me.â⬠There was no need for me to say any more. He'd known from that first attempt at his name who I was. I had a feeling he would have known my voice in any situation. He probably knew the sound of my heartbeat and breathing. As it was, I think I stopped breathing while I waited for his response. When it came, it was a little disappointing. ââ¬Å"No.â⬠ââ¬Å"No what?â⬠I asked. ââ¬Å"As in, no, it's not me?â⬠He exhaled in frustration, a sound almostââ¬âbut not quiteââ¬âlike the one he used to make when I did something particularly ridiculous in our trainings. ââ¬Å"No, as in I don't want to see you.â⬠His voice was thick with emotion. ââ¬Å"They weren't supposed to let you in.â⬠ââ¬Å"Yeah. Well, I kind of found a work-around.â⬠ââ¬Å"Of course you did.â⬠He still wouldn't face me, which was agonizing. I glanced over at Mikhail, who gave me a nod of encouragement. I guessed I should be glad that Dimitri was talking to me at all. ââ¬Å"I had to see you. I had to know if you were okay.â⬠ââ¬Å"I'm sure Lissa's already updated you.â⬠ââ¬Å"I had to see for myself.â⬠ââ¬Å"Well, now you see.â⬠ââ¬Å"All I see is your back.â⬠It was maddening, yet every word I got out of him was a gift. It felt like a thousand years since I'd heard his voice. Like before, I wondered how I could have ever confused the Dimitri in Siberia with this one. His voice had been identical in both places, the same pitch and accent, yet as a Strigoi, his words had always left a chill in the air. This was warm. Honey and velvet and all sorts of wonderful things wrapping around me, no matter the terrible things he was saying. ââ¬Å"I don't want you here,â⬠said Dimitri flatly. ââ¬Å"I don't want to see you.â⬠I took a moment to assess strategy. Dimitri still had that depressed, hopeless feel around him. Lissa had approached it with kindness and compassion. She'd gotten through his defenses, though a lot of that was because he regarded her as his savior. I could try a similar tactic. I could be gentle and supportive and full of loveââ¬âall of which were true. I loved him. I wanted to help him so badly. Yet I wasn't sure that particular method would work for me. Rose Hathaway was not always known for the soft approach. I did, however, play on his sense of obligation. ââ¬Å"You can't ignore me,â⬠I said, trying to keep my volume out of range of the other guardians. ââ¬Å"You owe me. I saved you.â⬠A few moments of silence passed. ââ¬Å"Lissa saved me,â⬠he said carefully. Anger burned within my chest, just it had when I'd watched Lissa visit him. How could he hold her in such high regard but not me? ââ¬Å"How do you think she got to that point?â⬠I demanded. ââ¬Å"How do you think she learned how to save you? Do you have any idea what weââ¬âwhat Iââ¬âhad to go through to get that information? You think me going to Siberia was crazy? Believe me, you haven't even come close to seeing crazy. You know me. You know what I'm capable of. And I broke my own records this time. You. Owe. Me.â⬠It was harsh, but I needed a reaction from him. Some kind of emotion. And I got it. He jerked around, eyes glinting and power crackling through his body. As always, his movements were both fierce and graceful. Likewise, his voice was a mix of emotions: anger, frustration, and concern. ââ¬Å"Then the best thing I can do isââ¬âââ¬Å" He froze. The brown eyes that had been narrowed with aggravation suddenly went wide withâ⬠¦ what? Amazement? Awe? Or perhaps that stunned feeling I kept having when I saw him? Because suddenly, I was pretty sure he was experiencing the same thing I had earlier. He'd seen me plenty of times in Siberia. He'd seen me just the other night at the warehouse. But nowâ⬠¦ now he was truly viewing me with his own eyes. Now that he was no longer Strigoi, his whole world was different. His outlook and feelings were different. Even his soul was different. It was like one of those moments when people talked about their lives flashing before their eyes. Because as we stared at one another, every part of our relationship replayed in my mind's eye. I remembered how strong and invincible he'd been when we first met, when he'd come to bring Lissa and me back to the folds of Moroi society. I remembered the gentleness of his touch when he'd bandaged my bloodied and battered hands. I remembered him carrying me in his arms after Victor's daughter Natalie had attacked me. Most of all, I remembered the night we'd been together in the cabin, just before the Strigoi had taken him. A year. We'd known each other only a year, but we'd lived a lifetime in it. And he was realizing that too, I knew, as he studied me. His gaze was all-powerful, taking in every single one of my features and filing them away. Dimly, I tried to recall what I looked like today. I still wore the dress from the secret meeting and knew it looked good on me. My eyes were probably bloodshot from crying earlier, and I'd only had time for a quick brushing of my hair before heading off with Adrian. Somehow, I doubted any of it mattered. The way Dimitri was looking at meâ⬠¦ it confirmed everything I'd suspected. The feelings he'd had for me before he'd been turnedââ¬âthe feelings that had become twisted while a Strigoiââ¬âwere all still there. They had to be. Maybe Lissa was his savior. Maybe the rest of the Court thought she was a goddess. I knew, right then, that no matter how bedraggled I looked or how blank he tried to keep his face, I was a goddess to him. He swallowed and forcibly gained control of himself, just like he always had. Some things never changed. ââ¬Å"Then the best thing I can do,â⬠he continued calmly, ââ¬Å"is to stay away from you. That's the best way to repay the debt.â⬠It was hard for me to keep control and maintain some sort of logical conversation. I was as awestruck as he was. I was also outraged. ââ¬Å"You offered to repay Lissa by staying by her side forever!â⬠ââ¬Å"I didn't do the thingsâ⬠¦Ã¢â¬ He averted his eyes for a moment, again struggling for control, and then met mine once more. ââ¬Å"I didn't do the things to her that I did to you.â⬠ââ¬Å"You weren't you! I don't care.â⬠My temper was starting to burn again ââ¬Å"How many?â⬠he exclaimed. ââ¬Å"How many guardians died last night because of what I did?â⬠ââ¬Å"Iâ⬠¦ I think six or seven.â⬠Harsh losses. I felt a small pang in my chest, recalling the names read off in that basement room. ââ¬Å"Six or seven,â⬠Dimitri repeated flatly, anguish in his voice. ââ¬Å"Dead in one night. Because of me.â⬠ââ¬Å"You didn't act alone! And I told you, you weren't you. You couldn't control yourself. It doesn't matter to meââ¬âââ¬Å" ââ¬Å"It matters to me!â⬠he shouted, his voice ringing through the hallway. The guardians at each end shifted but didn't approach. When Dimitri spoke again, he kept his voice lower, but it was still trembling with wild emotions. ââ¬Å"It matters to me. That's what you don't get. You can't understand. You can't understand what it's like knowing what I did. That whole time being Strigoiâ⬠¦ it's like a dream now, but it's one I remember clearly. There can be no forgiveness for me. And what happened with you? I remember that most of all. Everything I did. Everything I wanted to do.â⬠ââ¬Å"You're not going to do it now,â⬠I pleaded. ââ¬Å"So let it go. Beforeââ¬âbefore everything happened, you said we could be together. That we'd get assignments near each other andââ¬âââ¬Å" ââ¬Å"Roza,â⬠he interrupted, the nickname piercing my heart. I think he'd slipped up, not truly meaning to call me that. There was a twisted smile on his lips, one without humor. ââ¬Å"Do you really think they're going to ever let me be a guardian again? It'll be a miracle if they let me live!â⬠ââ¬Å"That's not true. Once they realize you've changed and that you're really your old selfâ⬠¦ everything'll go back to how it was.â⬠He shook his head sadly. ââ¬Å"Your optimismâ⬠¦ your belief that you can make anything happen. Oh, Rose. It's one of the amazing things about you. It's also one of the most infuriating things about you.â⬠ââ¬Å"I believed that you could come back from being a Strigoi,â⬠I pointed out. ââ¬Å"Maybe my belief in the impossible isn't so crazy after all.â⬠This conversation was so grave, so heartbreaking, yet it still kept reminding me of some of our old practice sessions. He'd try to convince me of some serious point, and I'd counter it with Rose-logic. It would usually earn me a mix of amusement and exasperation. I had the feeling that were the situation just a little different, he'd have that same attitude now. But this was not a practice session. He wouldn't smile and roll his eyes. This was serious. This was life and death. ââ¬Å"I'm grateful for what you did,â⬠he said formally, still struggling to master his feelings. It was another trait we shared, both of us always working to stay in control. He'd always been better at it than me. ââ¬Å"I do owe you. And it's a debt I can't pay. Like I said, the best thing I can do is stay out of your life.â⬠ââ¬Å"If you're part of Lissa's, then you can't avoid me.â⬠ââ¬Å"People can exist around each other withoutâ⬠¦ without there being any more than that,â⬠he said firmly. It was such a Dimitri thing to say. Logic fighting emotion. And that's when I lost it. Like I said, he was always better at keeping control. Me? Not so much. I threw myself against the bars, so rapidly that even Mikhail flinched. ââ¬Å"But I love you!â⬠I hissed. ââ¬Å"And I know you love me too. Do you really think you can spend the rest of your life ignoring that when you're around me?â⬠The troubling part was that for a very long time at the Academy, Dimitri had been convinced he could do exactly that. And he had been prepared to spend his life not acting on his feelings for me. ââ¬Å"You love me,â⬠I repeated. ââ¬Å"I know you do.â⬠I stretched my arm through the bars. It was a long way from touching him, but my fingers reached out desperately, as though they might suddenly grow and be able to make contact. That was all I needed. One touch from him to know he still cared, one touch to feel the warmth of his skin andââ¬â ââ¬Å"Isn't it true,â⬠said Dimitri quietly, ââ¬Å"that you're involved with Adrian Ivashkov?â⬠My arm dropped. ââ¬Å"Whââ¬âwhere did you hear that?â⬠ââ¬Å"Things get around,â⬠he said, echoing Mikhail. ââ¬Å"They certainly do,â⬠I muttered. ââ¬Å"So are you?â⬠he asked more adamantly. I hesitated before answering. If I told him the truth, he'd have more ground to make his point about us keeping apart. It was impossible for me to lie to him, though. ââ¬Å"Yes, butââ¬âââ¬Å" ââ¬Å"Good.â⬠I'm not sure how I expected him to react. Jealousy? Shock? Instead, as he leaned back against the wall, he lookedâ⬠¦ relieved. ââ¬Å"Adrian's a better person than he gets credit for. He'll be good to you.â⬠ââ¬Å"Butââ¬âââ¬Å" ââ¬Å"That's where your future is, Rose.â⬠A bit of that hopeless, world-weary attitude was returning. ââ¬Å"You don't understand what it's like coming through what I didââ¬âcoming back from being a Strigoi. It's changed everything. It's not just that what I did to you is unforgiveable. All my feelingsâ⬠¦ my emotions for youâ⬠¦ they changed. I don't feel the way I used to. I might be a dhampir again, but after what I went throughâ⬠¦ well, it's scarred me. It altered my soul. I can't love anyone now. I can'tââ¬âI don'tââ¬âlove you. There's nothing more between you and me.â⬠My blood turned cold. I refused to believe his words, not after the way he'd looked at me earlier. ââ¬Å"No! That's not true! I love you and youââ¬âââ¬Å" ââ¬Å"Guards!â⬠Dimitri shouted, his voice so loud that it was a wonder the whole building didn't shake. ââ¬Å"Get her out of here. Get her out of here!â⬠With amazing guardian reflexes, the guards were down at the cell in a flash. As a prisoner, Dimitri wasn't in a position to make requests, but the authorities here certainly weren't going to encourage a situation that would create a commotion. They began herding Mikhail and me out, but I resisted. ââ¬Å"No, waitââ¬âââ¬Å" ââ¬Å"Don't fight it,â⬠murmured Mikhail in my ear. ââ¬Å"Our time's running out, and you couldn't have accomplished anything else today anyway.â⬠I wanted to protest, but the words stuck on my lips. I let the guardians direct me out, but not before I gave Dimitri one last, lingering look. He had a perfect, guardian-blank look on his face, but the piercing way he stared at me made me certain there was a lot going on within him. Mikhail's friend was still on duty upstairs, which let us slip out without getting inââ¬âmuchââ¬âmore trouble. As soon as we were outdoors, I came to a halt and kicked one of the steps angrily. ââ¬Å"Damn it!â⬠I yelled. A couple of Moroi across the courtyardââ¬âprobably coming home from some late partyââ¬âgave me startled looks. ââ¬Å"Calm down,â⬠said Mikhail. ââ¬Å"This was the first time you've seen him since the change. There are only so many miracles you can expect right away. He'll come around.â⬠ââ¬Å"I'm not so sure,â⬠I grumbled. Sighing, I looked up at the sky. Little wispy clouds moved lazily about, but I barely saw them. ââ¬Å"You don't know him like I do.â⬠Because while part of me thought that a lot of what Dimitri had said was indeed a reaction to the shock of returning to himself, there was another part of me that wondered. I knew Dimitri. I knew his sense of honor, his adamant beliefs about what was right and wrong. He stood by those beliefs. He lived his life by them. If he truly, truly believed that the right thing to do was to avoid me and let any relationship between us fade, wellâ⬠¦ there was a good chance he might very well act on that idea, no matter the love between us. As I'd recalled earlier, he'd certainly shown a lot of resistance back at St. Vladimir's. As for the restâ⬠¦ the part about him no longer loving me or being able to love anyoneâ⬠¦ well, that would be a different problem all together if it were true. Both Christian and Adrian had worried there would be some piece of Strigoi left in him, but their fears had been about violence and bloodshed. No one would have guessed this: that living as a Strigoi had hardened his heart, killing any chance of him loving anyone. Killing any chance of him loving me. And I was pretty sure that if that was the case, then part of me would die too.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)